


My Lover, My Liar, Would’ve Traded All For You

by officialangelcas



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angel Cas, Castiel is mute, College Student Dean, Kinda, M/M, Past Abuse, Plot Twist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-16
Updated: 2017-11-16
Packaged: 2019-02-03 03:23:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12740010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/officialangelcas/pseuds/officialangelcas
Summary: the one where Dean thinks Castiel is mute but really he's just an angel that isn't allowed to speak to humansora fluffy one shot with a plot twist





	My Lover, My Liar, Would’ve Traded All For You

It’s lunch time on a Thursday. Castiel sits outside, on the bench reading when a strange doe-eyed young man plops down next to him in the campus courtyard.   
"Hey, how’re you doing?" the boy asks, making Castiel jump slightly in alarm, but continues to stare down at his book. The boy isn't taken aback by the lack of response. In fact, he presses on, “What are you reading?"   
Castiel just lifts it slightly to reveal the cover which is The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom. "My name's Dean,” he says-- as if Castiel asked. “And yours is?”  
Castiel looks away from the page. He sighs and then grabs his notebook from his bag, pointing to where he has written ‘Castiel’ neatly at the top.  
“Castiel,” he says and nods. “Well Cas, it was nice meeting you.”  
This has Castiel blushing slightly and he wants to continue the discussion, but Dean gets up and goes back inside waving a hand at him. Castiel walks to his next class, thoughts of Dean never leaving his mind.  
***  
"Hi, Cas.”  
Castiel smiles and looks up from the paper he’s working on in the courtyard. Flowers start to bloom all around and his eyes widen a little. Sometimes his Angel Grace just seeps out without him enabling it. It’s that lack of control that used to get him trouble back in Heaven.   
Dean doesn’t seem to notice. Humans are funny that way. They don’t notice things that happen right before their eyes. If something impossible happens, they play it off as a trick of the eye. As a guardian angel, his power is not as strong on Earth as it was in Heaven. His orders were not to speak to any humans. So, he doesn’t speak, he merely observes. This suits him just fine, though, he finds humans quite interesting.   
He doesn’t always guard specific ones. Sometimes he’s assigned to specific humans and sometimes he’s asked to go to certain locations to watch over. He’s been on various missions since being relocated to Earth and he tries not to get too attached each time. Humans live short lives and it’s difficult when he lives so closely with them.  
Castiel tilts his head a little at the nickname. He stares intently into Dean’s eyes for a moment, confused, as Dean starts to babble about a band that Castiel hadn’t heard of before. He stares back at him, unfazed.   
Castiel wants to speak. He wants to speak to every human, of course, but this one…this one is particularly interesting.  
“Do you like music, Cas?”  
Castiel nods in response and Dean pulls out an old Walkman. “I have some tapes, if you wanna listen with me.”  
Castiel nods gratefully and takes one of the headphones that’s offered to him and listens to what Dean tells him is Led Zeppelin. He smiles, seeing Dean so happy to share his music with him. Insignificant things like this make humans very happy, he notes. Dean offers for them to listen to more music at his house and Castiel stands, motioning for him to lead the way.  
He finds his way into Dean’s car which he starts to rave about, “It’s a 1967 Chevy Impala. My dad had it, then he passed it down to me. I call her Baby. Best car anyone could have.”  
Castiel admires the car as they drive to his house, nodding to the music on the way there. Once they arrive, he follows Dean up to his apartment and Dean shrugs apologetically, “Sorry, I know it’s not much but it’s a place to live. Better than nothing, right?”   
They spend much of the night listening to music on Dean’s stereo.   
***  
A few weeks go by like that. Dean invites Castiel out or they just stay in and listen to music. Dean talks a lot about his younger brother Sam who’s at Stanford with his girlfriend Jess.  
“They’re perfect for each other,” Dean had said a couple nights ago. He had a certain fondness to his voice when he spoke of his brother. “They’re both complete nerds, and all in love and shit. It’s disgusting,” he said, but there was no heat behind his words.  
Castiel gets called up to Heaven one day when he’s supposed to have dinner with Dean. He stands before one of the angels in charge of him, Uriel. “Castiel, Dean Winchester has been made your newest assignment. We have noticed that you have been spending a lot of time with him. You are getting too close.”  
Castiel wears a frown on his face, as he starts to panic internally. “I have only been observing him, Uriel. I have never spoken to him. I am following God’s orders.”  
“Well I am in charge of you, Castiel. You get your orders from me.”  
“Watch it, Uriel, you are close to blasphemy.”  
Castiel is sent back to Earth without a word.   
At the diner where him and Dean were supposed to meet. He sits across from Dean. Watching him as he keeps checking the time on his watch.   
Dean in now his assignment, and he can no longer see Castiel. He reaches out and touches his hand has it rests near his drink, even though he knows Dean can no longer feel him, either.  
***  
A few nights later, Castiel is watching over Dean as he sleeps. He gets an idea. A loophole. He makes his way into Dean’s head, inside his dream. Dean is washing his Impala and listening to classic rock, singing along loudly. Castiel touches Dean’s shoulder, and to his relief, Dean spins around and looks at him.  
“Hello Dean,” Castiel says in his deep, gruff voice.  
Dean’s eyes are wide. He clearly is confused by Castiel’s presence and by him speaking. “I’m— I must be dreaming. Real Cas hasn’t come over since he blew off our date.”  
“Date?” Castiel tilts his head to the side.  
“I don’t know, maybe? Real Cas doesn’t speak. You can’t exactly pick up signals, you know.”  
“I’m real,” Castiel tries. “I have been with you. I was at…dinner. You could not see me.”  
“I must’ve had too many beers before bed for my mind to conjure this shit up.”  
“You spend a lot of time alone,” Castiel states as more of an observation than an insult.  
“Thanks for pointing that one out. I go to school, I work at Bobby’s shop fixing cars, I’ve told you all this. I have Charlie, I have Sam—”  
“Sam is at Stanford,” Castiel points out.  
“I like being alone. I’m fine,” Dean huffs out as he continues to wash the car.  
“No, you have nightmares of being alone and of past of neglect,” Castiel says.  
Dean gives up on washing the already spotless car and he turns to Castiel, touching his cheek. Castiel tries not to notice the way he instinctively leans into Dean’s touch.   
“I wish I knew what your voice really sounded like. Or why you won’t come back.”  
“I’m sorry, Dean.”  
He leaves his dream and looks away when Dean wakes up startled and disgruntled. Humans aren’t supposed to be alone. Much like bees, Castiel has noticed. Bees live in hives and only leave to pollinate flowers then come back to their hive. Dean has no hive. Castiel doesn’t feel like he has a hive either sometimes.  
***  
Castiel tries to stay out of Dean’s dreams but it’s the only way he’s able to speak to him. Sometimes Dean sees him, sometimes he doesn’t, but each time he wakes up crying. Castiel writes a note to Dean that day. Apparently, it’s a particularly difficult day for Dean. The day his father passed away. Even though his father was abusive in the past, Dean seems upset on the anniversary of his death. Dean is writing a paper for class at his desk and Castiel leaves a sticky note that reads, ‘I’m here -C.”  
Dean looks around and writes on another sticky note. ‘Where? -D.’  
Castiel sighs. Humans never believe the impossible. ‘Next to you -C.’  
Now this gets his attention, he’s looking right at Castiel but it’s more like he’s looking past him. “Really losing it now,” Dean mumbles.  
Castiel takes his hands and Dean jerks away for a moment, then he relaxes and puts his hands out again. “Cas?” he asks and his voice cracks slightly.  
Dean’s expression changes then and he’s looking right into his eyes. “Are you dead? Am I dead? Or sleeping?”  
“No, it’s really me. I’m not sure how you can see me. You shouldn’t be able to see me. Or hear me,” he says trying not to notice the smile that takes over Dean’s face.  
“Cas, what are you? Who are you?”  
“I am an angel of the lord.”  
Dean shakes his head and looks away. “Those don’t exist.”  
Castiel frowns in confusion. He takes a step back and extends his wings for a moment to show Dean. In this form, his wings can’t be seen unless he allows. They are not physical in a way that any human could touch or understand. They reflect on the wall and appear as a deep black color.  
Dean’s eyes widen, and he takes a moment to process this. “You’re an angel. Not a mute, college student that isn’t interested in me?”  
Castiel goes on to explain why he couldn’t speak to him and why he shouldn’t be able to see him right now. “Guardian angels are not supposed to interact with the human they are assigned to. It is strictly business. I am a soldier, protecting you from anything that tries to take you before it’s your time.”  
“You’ve been watching me…”  
“You are unhappy,” Castiel observes.  
“I’m not thrilled. Who knows what you’ve seen? Embarrassing things…private moments…”  
“I am an angel, those things do not matter to me.”  
“What’s going on with you? When we met, you acted human. We had fun. But now you’re…”  
“A guardian,” Castiel finishes.  
“Yeah! We’re friends, I know you. Or at least I thought I did.”  
“I do not understand what I have done to upset you, Dean.”  
“You played me. I’m not like you, I’m human. I have feelings.”  
And just like that Castiel is gone. Not because of Dean. Uriel has called him up to Heaven for another scolding. This time Castiel doesn’t listen. He goes back to Dean, blatantly disobeying orders to watch his charge take apart his room in frustration.  
***  
He knocks on Dean’s door a few days later, “Hello Dean.”  
“Cas?”  
“I’m here to take you out for dinner.”  
“Why? Am I asleep?”  
“I found an old diner. They are said to have the best burgers in town, the sign says ‘epic food’. Oh, and there’s pie.”  
“Burgers and pie? Who died?” Dean asks.  
“What? Were you listening? No one died, I—"  
Dean puts a hand up to stop Castiel from talking. “It’s an expression. Let me get my keys.”  
“I have a vehicle.”  
Dean frowns. “Like I said, let me get my keys.”  
Castiel nods and tries giving him a light smile. They walk to Dean’s car and Castiel gets in the passenger seat.  
“Cas, why are you doing this?”   
“What is it you called it? A date?”  
“I never…wait…” Dean looks away, clearly trying to hide the small blush that spreads across his cheeks.  
“I will pay for your food,” Castiel says.  
“What? You will not!”  
“Dean, I know what a date is. I am going to pay. But if you do not drive, we will never get there.”  
Dean looks like he wants to argue, but he starts driving to the diner.  
When they arrive at the diner, Dean seems to have an attitude change. He opens the door for Castiel and says, “Table for two,” with the biggest smile. “You caught me off guard. With the date…I would’ve done this right. Dressed nicer…” he says frowning down at his flannel and ripped jeans.  
“You look fine,” Castiel responds.  
“Says the person that wears the same trench coat and suit every day.”  
“I enjoy this attire,” he says frowning.  
“Alright, fine. What do you like to eat?” Dean asks looking at the menu’s they were handed.  
“I don’t eat.”  
“Ever?”  
Castiel shakes his head. “I don’t need to eat.”  
“Well you are tonight. At least some pie. Now you have to tell me more about you, because apparently you know everything about me already.”  
“Well, I have been an angel since the beginning of creation. I am a guardian because I enjoy the company of humans. Not all angels can handle the complexities of human souls and emotions. Recently, I have been assigned by my superior, Uriel, to a certain Dean Winchester as an attempt to lessen my contact with him. But, obviously, that did not work, and I have orders from God to continue watching over you. You are important.”  
“I thought you weren’t allowed to speak to humans,” Dean says.  
“Well I made an exception for you…you are different-” Castiel cuts himself off and looks out the window. The realization of this familiar sight hitting him like a brick as he watches the rain move upwards, instead of downwards as gravity originally intended.   
He breathes roughly, “Oh, I see, this isn’t real. This is not what happened. I am not a guardian angel.”  
Dean sighs softly. “You could’ve let it go on for a little longer, you know. You never let your dreams end nicely, Cas.”  
“I know. This isn’t who I am. I am an angel of the lord, yes. But I fell from Heaven. All the angels did, because of me—what I did Even when Heaven was put back together, I’m still not a part of it,” He sighed heavily, “Tell me more about you, Dean. Tell me the real story of how we met. Of our real time together.”  
“C’mon Cas, you remember it.”  
“I want to hear you say it.”  
“Fine, I’m a hunter. Me and my brother, Sam, we save the world from monster, angels, demons, and even the devil himself. You name it, we’ve probably dealt with it. Years ago, when I went to Hell, you pulled me out, you saved me. You helped me and put me back together because God commanded it. You were a soldier, but you rebelled against Heaven to join me and Sam while we fought the good fight. But…you made a choice to save me and Sam from a deal we made. An oath, that if broken, would have cosmic consequences. You knew we’d be separated. You realized that you love me…that you’d give it all up for me because I made you who you are today. In our last hunt together against the devil, you got caught in the crossfire. You were killed and now you’re dead. You’re alone, Cas. In the empty. That’s where angels go when they die, they go into nothingness. But you can’t stay here anymore,” dream Dean explained.  
“How do I get out of here, Dean? What will happen if I wake up?” Castiel whispers.  
Dean shakes his head. “I’m sorry, Cas, but you have to wake up, now. You have to see for yourself.”  
A tear slips down Castiel’s face. “Just a little longer. Please,” he whispers reaching out to touch Dean. But a moment later Dean is gone and he’s opening his eyes to sunshine.   
He gasps and sits up looking down to make sure this is real. He’s himself, on Earth, somehow alive again. He smiles up at the sunshine and walks for what feels like hours trying to find a payphone to call Dean to tell him he’s alive, and he does. And when Dean gets out of the car, he stares at him for what feels like a slice of eternity, feeling an array of emotions.   
This is the real Dean. He runs over to him, hugging him tightly because when there’s too much to say, there always is. Dean feels like home and he’s almost giddy with happiness.   
He’s finally home.


End file.
